My Three-Hour Vacation from Reali-- I Mean, Julie's Baby Shower

Me, Julie, Mona, and Kathleen at Royal/T Cafe

My dear pal and neighbor Julie is going to have her second baby next month. To celebrate, me and her friends Mona and Kathleen (who also recently had baby number two!) decided to throw her a shower.
. It wasn't readily apparent what the color scheme should be, because Julie and Shawn are keeping the sex of the baby a surprise. I know, I know... How utterly selfish of them, right? Don't they realize that they made the shower-planning harder because we were restricted to a few gender-neutral colors? And how about the fact that they're closing their friends and family off from a veritable universe of adorable but gender-specific baby gifts and clothing? GEEZ.
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Kathleen though it would be cute to have a "tea" theme (after all, both boys and girls drink tea!), so we chose Royal/T Cafe in Culver City as the venue. In between bites of Kobe beef burger and sips (gulps) of vino, we played fun baby shower games and chatted with one another. Then we went on to the de rigeur opening of gifts.
. I wanted to give Julie something special. She's my closest mommy friend, and Nolan is Benjamin's best buddy. The fact that I've heard Shawn and Vince say to one another "Save me! I lost my meatshield!" leads me to believe they have a special bond, too. So for Julie, I sewed a diaper clutch with matching changing pad and zippered pouch. For Baby Bowen, I made a blanket lovie with a snap-close tether for a pacifier or favorite toy.
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After several hours of laughter, food, and revelry, the party wound to a close. It had been a lovely afternoon, and it was hard to decide what the best part of it was. Was it getting to see the other wonderful women in Julie's life and celebrating this exciting time with all of them? Was it having the chance to toast a dear friend? Was it getting the rare opportunity to put on make up and high heels instead of my daily uniform of jeans and flip flops? To be honest, I think the best part of the shower was the fact that it gave me a break from this:
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Since Calliope's birth, I've been running on empty. I mean, having one kid is tough, but at least then you can hope to get a little time to yourself once in a while. Having two kids is a different story. Your personal time disappears like a fart in the wind. Yeah, having two kids is h-a-a-a-a-r-d. God, I hope Julie isn't reading this. She should be spending her remaining days in sweet ignorant bliss. Pretty soon, she'll have twice as much of everything - twice the laundry, twice the mess, twice the headache, twice the tantrums.

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Twice the love.

Absolutely Puzzled

Since Calliope was born three months ago, the amount of time Benjamin spends watching TV has gone up dramatically. Though I have no problem turning on the tube for brief periods when I need to finish dinner, use the restroom, or shut myself in a closet to quietly sob out the day's frustrations (kidding!), I really was starting to worry about just how much TV he was getting. The fact that the first word out of his mouth after he wakes up is sometimes "Dora!" (as in the title character of his fave cartoon "Dora the Explorer") doesn't help. So in an effort to find an engaging activity for him that doesn't involve the TV, computer, or any other electronic babysitter -- I mean, device, I bought him some simple wooden jigsaw puzzles. I picked a set of four 12-piece puzzles with pictures of Benjamin's favorite vehicles on them - a bus, a choo choo train, a car, and a fye-uh twuck.

At first, Vince and I had to sit with Benjamin and assemble each puzzle with him. Benjamin would try to fit the pieces together incorrectly and throw them across the table when they wouldn't fit. But soon, we noticed that he was becoming more focused and more patient, taking the time to slowly try out each piece until they all fit together. Granted, there are only twelve pieces in each puzzle, but it wasn't bad for a toddler who is so impatient about wearing his favorite boots that he doesn't mind if he puts them on the wrong feet!

One particularly hectic morning, I popped Calliope in a sling, turned on Dora the Explorer, and went in to the kitchen to do some cleaning. I realized ten minutes later that I hadn't heard Benjamin shouting at the TV like he usually does when Dora's on. I went to the check on him and and almost passed out when I saw that the puzzles were assembled. My delight at seeing him successfully complete each puzzle was matched only by my joy that for once, the TV didn't win out over another activity. But as you can see here, sometimes Benjamin manages to, um, "multitask," though:

Even though he loves puzzles, he can't resist Dora the Explorer's siren song!

Vince likes to mess with Benjamin by combining his puzzles. He'll take several complete sets, break them down, and totally mix them up like they're mah jong pieces. Sometimes, he'll even chuckle this evil little chuckle. "Muahahaha! Take that, hapless little toddler!"

Benjamin's voice plaintively saying, "Uh-oh, missing piece!" just breaks my heart. I found that missing piece a little while later. It was inexplicably placed in a plastic cup inside one of the drawers of his toy chest. By then, Benjamin had moved on to the next activity, but I swear I saw Vince smiling to himself behind his paper.

The Best Job in the World

My direct supervisors, Boss Benjamin and Chief Calliope

If there's one thing a stay-at-home mom hates being asked, it's, "So what do you do all day?" What don't we do all day?? It's 11 am, and this is a list of things that I've done so far:

• Gotten up before everyone else to finish a sewing project
• Put away the laundry
• Dressed the kids
• Fed the pug
• Fed Benjamin
• Nursed Calliope three times (and a fourth as I type)
• Made a grocery list
• Started a load of diaper laundry
• Allowed Benjamin to watch TV so I could clean up the kitchen and drink a cup of coffee while browsing Etsy
• Built and dismantled about twenty Magna-Tiles structures with Benjamin
• Attempted to explain to Benjamin why crayon goes on paper
• Scrubbed crayon off of the walls
• Taken Benjamin to the potty and wiped his tushie three times
• Wiped Benjamin's runny nose three dozen times
• Gone to the bank
• Made a trip to the doc's office for an ear infection (Benjamin's)
• Changed four diapers (Calliope's)
• Picked up several pairs of dirty socks (the Dirty Sock Fairy's)
• Hopped on the computer to do some writing and reclaim some sanity (mine)

Being a full-time mom is a full-time job, and a thankless one at that. At least when you have a "real" job (meaning a job for which you receive a W-2), a paycheck quantifies your efforts. You're entitled to a lunch break, and you get to go to the bathroom whenever you need to. I usually squeeze in brunch at around 2 pm, and I've mastered the art of the Ten-Second Potty Break - while nursing a baby and yelling at a toddler at the same time. Don't worry - hand-washing takes up most of that ten seconds.

So the other morning when, bleary-eyed from being up with Calliope all night and attempting to feed oatmeal to a tantruming Benjamin, I heard my husband say to me, "You're not looking forward to going to your job today?", I nearly fainted. Finally, I was getting what that every SAHM craves: the acknowledgement that what I do every day is a job! If I wasn't already weeping from exhaustion, I would have wept with joy.

There is, however, one very important thing that this job has that no other can offer. Make that two very important things:

.Sure makes the long hours, the lack of sick time, or the absence of year-end bonuses seem like a small potatoes. I could go on, but right now, I have to run. The bosses are calling.

Don't Forget the Lyrics

When Benjamin was just months old, his Auntie Yvonne bought him a CD with songs that featured his name. He's been listening to that CD off and on for the last two years, and he's finally picked up some of the lyrics:

Ok, so he's really only picked up a single word of the lyrics, but to be fair, it's the only word that really matters! Good job, Ben-ben-ben!